The yearly Company Picnic is scheduled for Monday, May 27th from 12pm to dark. You are required to attend. Full information below!
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Subject: You are invited to The Company Picnic
Who: All members of The Company (if you are reading this, that means you’re a member of the Company)
Where: Prospect Park West
When: Monday, May 27 (Noon-Dark)
Bring: Food, Snacks, Fun, Cash
Directions: Take the F/G train to 7th Ave – exit at the front of the train on 8th ave. Walk up the hill on 9th to Prospect Park. The Bandshell is right there on your right. We’ll be on the other side of the bandshell. If you get lost, make sure you’re on Prospect Park West
Less than 2 weeks away!
20% Chance of Rain.
Picnic is happening. We will not let weather deter us.
From: The Board of Directors
To: All Employees
Subject: The Company Picnic and Guac/Off – Monday, May 28th
Dearest employees. Despite the economic decline, The Company has had enormous growth over the past year in our Television, Movie, Theatrical, and Web Series divisions. To celebrate such windfall The Company will once again host a mandatory picnic meeting on Monday, May 28th from noon until dark. The meeting will, as always, be held in the Prospect Park conference and recreation facility.
This meeting will focus exclusively on the business of recreation. Growth in our Memorial and Recreational products division continues in this unprecedented economic expansion. We will again be testing kickballs, frisbees, footballs, and footbags (“Hackey Sacks”). Please dress appropriately. We continue to look for leadership in the Four Square arena, and will liberally promote those willing to take charge. Team building exercises like Werewolf and touch football will continue as in previous years.
We are pleased to announce the Third Annual Memorial Day Guac/Off. With one head of the Official Guac Committee now entrenched in our West Coast Division, the call has gone out for well qualified applicants to step forward to lead this competition. If you would like to participate in the contest, please bring Guacamole and be prepared to eat it. The best guacamole will win a promotion and a coveted “Most Delicious Guacamole” badge that you will be allowed to display for one year in any forum you may so choose.
The Board of Directors has generously authorized the purchase of hot dog, buns, fixins, and non-food items (cups, plates, trashbags, etc.) Employees are asked to supply chips, sodas, meats, or desert. That said, let us never forget the chip debacle of 2008, in which employee chip purchases single-handedly insulated the chip industry from the economic downturn.
We need not remind you that the few employees who failed to attend last year’s picnic were summarily fired. Please use the appropriate hashtag #thecompanypicnic on all approved social media.
THIS IS A MANDATORY MEETING.
Directions: Take the F train to 7th Ave – exit at the front of the train on 8th ave. walk up the hill on 9th to Prospect Park. The Bandshell is right there on your right. we’ll be on the other side of the bandshell. if you get lost, make sure you’re on Prospect Park West